Who was in that cookie jar before you had it?

By Chuck Thompson | The Shelby Independent

OPINION – While not everyone is cremated, many people (and pets) most certainly are; my dog Yogi Bear is, too.

Yogi Bear died at the ripe old age of 16 ½, five years ago, on June 13, 2021. I keep him on a shelf, in the memorial container I was given when I received his ashes. Some might think that’s weird, but anyone who has the ashes of a loved one wouldn’t think so. I just can’t bring myself to spread his ashes or bury them.

The other day when I moved his container to another room, the thought hit me – obviously this container is for pet ashes, it has paw prints on it and other identifying designs that it's solely for a pet's ashes, but what about people that keep their ashes of loved ones in a vase or some sort of nice ceramic container – maybe something that resembles a cookie jar?

I’m not very familiar with this process because everyone in my family that has passed away is buried; we don’t cremate in my traditional Southern Baptist upbringing. Yes, some Southern Baptists do cremate, but not in my traditional family upbringing. The McSwains have graves dating back to pre-Revolutionary War at a church just outside of Boiling Springs. David McSwain was the first (known) person in my family line to be buried in Cleveland County dating back to 1770. He died six years before the Declaration of Independence was even drafted.

Cremation isn't something I'm accustomed to, but I know a lot of people do choose cremation, so maybe they’re more acutely aware about what you're going to read in this column than those of us that don’t, but maybe not - that is what leads to my curiosity...

For those that do not practice inurnment of their loved one’s / family member’s ashes and you keep them somewhere in their home, how many generations does the ashes remain with the family until nobody knows who is in there or never met their long-past relative and therefore it has no sentimental value to them?

Back a hundred years ago, when they used cookie jar looking containers (Urns) to place ashes inside, without the ashes also being placed inside a sanitary / safety wrap, and these items were given to one of the children or the grandchildren; how long did they stay as-is and who decides to get rid of them – or is that the unspoken impolite topic not to be discussed because nobody wants to admit they dumped out the ashes or vacuumed them up when the vase broke?

Have you ever wondered why the inside of a vase you were given was so dirty on the inside when you washed it? ... I haven't either. awkward long pause...

And then what? Dare I say…. Your grandma had this nice container but you don’t know what it was used for because it was found in the closet or in the attic or the back of her kitchen cabinets, so.. Even though it was an ugly green or a weird swirly spotted blue and yellow vase you decided to either 1. Quietly sell it at a garage sale and not think anything else of it after that. 2. Clean it up and use it as a flower vase, or 3. It has a lid, so you put your sugar or flour in it, or maybe cookies?

Or maybe you bought it at an antique store, or a yard sale, and haven’t thought much about it until – wait, where did you go? Hello….? Did you just stop reading and go check that old thing your mom gave you that your great aunt Ethel owned until your grandmother had it…

Oh no… you remember going to Ethel’s funeral but… you have no memory of the burial.

I’m so sorry – I can’t help but wonder! Don’t hate me for this. I hope I didn’t ruin something for you, but now you can’t help but to wonder… What was that thing used for, before you had it?

Don’t be surprised if you see cookie jars and vases for sale this summer at yard sales; you’ll know who read this Sunday Column if they have a unique ceramic vase or jar for sale for five or ten dollars.

And if you buy one for yourself, maybe you should ask if they happen to know what it was used for… I’m sure they will say, “It’s just a decorative flower vase we don’t need anymore, but my mother-in-law used it as a cookie jar, but the lid broke so then she kept flowers in it.”

But please don’t let this column topic change your current use for any such item if it hasn’t bothered you yet. I’m sure that antique ceramic jar or old copper tin cup looking thing wasn’t used for that. I’m sure it was just for coffee storage, flour, sugar, cookies or maybe daisies and petunias.

However, if nobody knows where Great-Uncle Silas is buried, there’s a chance – just a chance… but, nah… it couldn’t have been used for that.   

Have a great week ahead. Monday not only starts a new week but also a new month. Enjoy June to its fullest - with or without your questionable-used antique vase / cookie jar.

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